The Fantasy Football Scoutcast
Let Mark and Granville sniff out your clean sheets and assist your fantasy football season with a regular serving of stuff and nonsense from the English Premiership. News and analysis is mixed with lively banter between the two bitter mini-league rivals as the pair laugh off a life of mid-table mediocrity.

The double Gameweek dominates episode 103 of the ScoutCast, providing a timely antidote a pitiful weekend of points scoring that saw even the great and good struggle. While your hosts hardly fit into that category, Granville and I dust ourselves down to rinse through the double Gameweek options, popping in on the Professor to get the “Rate My Team” viewpoint, before Jonty crashes the party to serve up another community themed conclusion.

 

This time around, Jonty brings a tale of armband woe: a Fantasy manager who misses the captain target with frustrating regularity. Whilst that manager’s luck should offer cheer, Jonty is also armed with a plethora of captain statistics that come courtesy of a former “Full Jonty” victim. Those particular revelations have me staring into the eyes of a certain Dutchman and wondering where it all went wrong.

 

 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP102_armband.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:49pm UTC

Sometimes, when in the presence of greatness, you can’t help feeling introspective. With Jonty rolling up with a very special “Full Jonty”, featuring none other than the current top ranked Fantasy Premier League manager, I cast my eye around my virtual dressing room with a feeling of disdain. What choice did I have but to gatecrash “Granny’s miffed”, reeling off my tale of woe as my once promising Fantasy season slips into oblivion. 

As for our Full Jonty candidate, his story is quite extraordinary. Managing from down under, using reports, highlights and stats to steer his team, this guy sleeps while we fidget and flinch at every clean sheet lost. Get your ears around this valuable insight into a top manager, whilst listening to some rather average ones reel off another round of ScoutCast regulars.

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP102_First.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:46pm UTC

Wake up and smell the coffee. The ScoutCast returns to jolt us back into life and get us prepped for another Gameweek. After another dullard international break, we come back to life over 100 minutes, delivering the usual mix of chatter, banter, debate and community spirit.

 

Resigned to mini-league defeat, Granville enjoys pointing out how I’m oh so wrong on the price rise tax, James McClean and Maynor Figueroa’s Gameweek potential. Jonty crashes in having leaped above me in the contributors league for a quick Rooney-themed gloat, followed by another “Full Jonty”, which this week puts focus on a “no hits please, I’m cautious” Fantasy manager from the Scout community. All the regulars squeeze in amongst that lot to deliver a lengthy wake-up call. 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP101_Sleepy.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:09pm UTC

One hundred up. Some achievement for two miserable so-and-so’s, confined in a room or hours on end, griping and gloating about Fantasy football.

 

I daren’t calculate the hours spent gazing into the beardy face of my Mancunian counterpart, or the minutes wasted while he moans about points on the bench. Equally, I doubt he’s recalling the hours he’s listened to me talk about Aleks Kolarov, Victor Moses or how my latest points hit will steer me to glory. Instead, we’ll look back fondly and remember the many, many good times.

 

Tonight’s special podcast includes a clip from the very first pilot show, Granville’s first, and some would say, last, attempt at ScoutCast humour. That’s followed by a flood of reminiscing, as Granville pinpoints some of his favourite episodes, while I see through my fixation with beating Last of the Summer Wine by checking out how they celebrated their own century of episodes, with depressingly predictable results.

 

Of course the regulars play their part, including the Professor and his Rate My Team computer and another stellar showing from the “Full Jonty”, this week featuring one of our very top managers in the community. Depressing stuff for a host just coming off the back of a red arrow.

 

Like Granville says, however, this is a time for celebrating. Here’s to the 100 and the next century to come. 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP100_Century.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:12pm UTC

One man’s personal battle to mastermind his beloved Fantasy Football team through extreme adversity steals the show in this week’s episode of the ScoutCast – and we’re not talking about Granville struggling with his BAFTA award-winning hangover. 

Episode 99 has all the usual ingredients as we look back on Gamweek 28, rinse through the Gameweek 29 options, pop in to disturb the Professor and his Rate My Team computer, analyse the transfer ins and outs and, of course, give another community member the “Fully Jonty” treatment. 

Jonty delivers a heart-warming and rather humbling account this week, emphasising just how far the dedicated Fantasy manager will go to steer his ship. Postponing your bedbath to play your Wildcard? You better believe it.

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP9_Convalescence.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:13pm UTC

The ScoutCast emerges from under the duvet, Lemsip soaked and coughing and spluttering its way towards a century of episodes. After a two-week break, the full crew are assembled as Granville joins me to celebrate his Gameweek victory, Professor Chris Atkinson returns from the slopes to charge up his “Rate My Team” computer and Jonty chips in with another community-powered “Full Jonty”.<!--more-->

Around this we discuss the unlikely scenario of selling on Robin, give our Scout League leaders a shout-out, analyse the transfer ins and outs in “All Aboard” and look ahead to the weekend’s programme. 

The “Full Jonty” rounds things off as “Ginkapo” gets the treatment, prompting a love-in with a certain Serbian left-back. 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP98_Splutter.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:36pm UTC

Better late than never, our ninety seventh episode of the ScoutCast delivers another 45 minutes of mirth, plus injury time. 

With the Professor otherwise engaged, it’s left to Jonty to provide backup to myself and Granville, arriving to deliver another “Fully Jonty” – the first to feature a community victim. 

Doosra’s Fantasy fortunes come under the microscope, revealing a penchant for bandwagons and knee jerk transfers. Nevertheless, we try to go easy on the experienced campaigner, rounding things off with the extraordinary tale of the Doosra rescuing Jonty’s dog – no really. 

That treat rounds off an episode that includes all the usual regulars, including our rinse through the forthcoming double Gameweek which Granville insists on placing within inverted commas: the weirdo. 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP97_Dogging.mp3
Category:podcasts -- posted at: 11:08pm UTC

As we close on a century of episodes it was time to freshen things up and bring new voices to accompany my drone and that of grumpy Granville. In this weeks’ episode, we draft in both “Professor” Chris Atkinson and his “Rate My Team” computer, plus long-time community member and contributor, Jonty, for a new ScoutCast regular.

Don’t worry, the usual format remains intact although, having recorded this just minutes after last night’s whistles, Granville escapes the usual mini-league grilling. Not surprisingly, there’s plenty of “Granny’s miffed” to endure, plus all aboard and the weekend preview. That’s’ rounded off by the “Full Jonty” a brand new feature that will bring you, the community, into our weekly ramblings. 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP96_Changes.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:02pm UTC

Rush. The best form of goalkeepers for the playground. A long-haired Canadian prog-rock outfit. A mustachioed goal sniffer and, sadly, a description of how Granville and myself had to approach this latest episode of the podcast.

 

With our studio slot limited, we had to skinny things up and turn this one out double-time. Nonetheless, in 25-minutes, we touched on all the regulars, whilst scattering the silence in between with the usual sniping between the pair of us. It makes you wonder what we waste the other twenty minutes on every week.

 

Not to worry. Enjoy what you can of this little taster and look ahead to next week’s full-length return, when we’re planning a new feature and a new voice.

 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP95_Rush.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:55pm UTC

Back for 2013, fully refreshed, slightly rusty and balancing the same chips on our shoulders, Granville are I make a return to the podcast studio.

 

The New Year presents my beleaguered co-host with a 51-point gap to bridge as I spent Christmas “ho-ho-ing” about three midfield hat-tricks, leaving Granville to roll out one mighty miffed in this week’s episode.

 

Elsewhere we pick at the double Gameweek buffet, eagerly scoffing on the Chelsea canapés whilst wondering if Rafa has put something nasty in the vol-a-vents. We rinse through the latest transfers in and out in “all aboard”, preview all the weekend fixtures and carry out the latest emergency surgery on the ailing ScoutCast team.

 

Direct download: FFScoutCast_EP94_Resumption.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:34pm UTC